Okay, you've started breastfeeding (congratulations!) but still want to sleep in every now and then, have some flexibility, let your partner take responsibility, etc. Well, then share breastfeeding! Easy as pie. Just throw out the pacifier sometimes and the bottle sometimes. Everyone happy and so easy. Or not.
It can really be easier said than done - to combine breastfeeding with a bottle. For many, it seems like a utopia - impossible to achieve. Too many dimensions that should simply work. But at the same time, some claim that they have made it work, so we want to try to find out as much as possible about the subject. Maybe it can be of some help on the way to your best solution - or maybe strengthen you in being forgiving towards yourself if things don't turn out as you had imagined.
"Totally Confused"
Some call it bottle confusion, but we think nipple confusion is a more fun word: It risks occurring for the baby when he has gotten a taste for the bottle. Perhaps it is easier to get the food in via the bottle and the baby then 'loses his appetite' for the breast. The confusion therefore consists, according to this theory, in the baby losing the skills he has practiced in sucking on the breast when the bottle is first offered, which perhaps involves a slightly different technique.
Pump, pump and pump some more
The supply of breast milk is completely dependent on demand. So, if you intend to breastfeed, production must be kept going, either by the baby eating from the breast or by pumping the milk. If neither happens, milk production will stop pretty soon. Similarly, if you pump a lot between feedings, for example, you will produce 'too much'. Finding a balance in breastfeeding can take a while even if you are exclusively breastfeeding. If you then add the parameter that the baby should be bottle-fed at certain meals, it can make it more difficult to find a balance in this supply. In most cases, you need to pump (or breastfeed) a few times per day and per night to maintain production.
Refuses to take the bottle
Some argue that the bottle must be introduced relatively early (but perhaps not too early to interfere with the establishment of breastfeeding?) so that the baby gets used to it and can then accept it. If you have tried and succeeded with a bottle a few times during the baby's first months, you may be shocked a few months later when the baby flatly refuses the bottle. "It worked when he was 3 months old, why wouldn't it work now at 7 months?". Yes, here some argue that bottle training needs to be done regularly for it to work. Others state that "some babies don't take a bottle, period".
Afraid that my baby will prefer the bottle
Mothers often mention that they have been told that introducing a bottle too early can make a baby 'lazy' - that they will no longer be able to do the work of sucking on the breast once they have learned that there are easier ways to get food - through the bottle. "The breast requires more patience from the baby" some say, but on the other hand there are bottles that are supposed to mimic breastfeeding and flow slowly. For some they seem to work just fine, and they say that the baby does not prefer one over the other. For others it does not work. Remember that there is no right or wrong, but that everyone's situation is different; all mothers are different, all babies are different, and the interactions between them are different.
Experiences from shared breastfeeding
When we at Unna have asked about experiences from shared breastfeeding, it can sound like this:
"The combination of breastfeeding and bottle feeding has worked great for us! We only introduced the bottle when breastfeeding got going properly and he bought it without any problems and hasn't stopped taking the breast because of it. The hard thing for me is that my breasts get so sore if I don't breastfeed often enough, so I haven't really made it work as a relief at night, but during the day it's worth it to be able to go away for shorter periods and know that dad can feed at home!"
but also like this:
"We started introducing bottles after a week in the neonatal unit. I was completely exhausted from pumping and nursing every three hours around the clock without getting any weight gain in our boy. As soon as he got my milk in a bottle, he started gaining weight. We breastfed and bottle-fed every day. He never got "confused" by the combination, but as the weeks went by, it was as if my body didn't want to pump anymore. After three months, my breasts weren't releasing a drop to the pump anymore. So there are aspects like that to take into account - it never quite turns out as you expect."
A warm reminder
It's easy - if you think you've succeeded well at something - to create a truth in retrospect that it was because I did this or that. At Unna, we believe that you should be humble about the fact that the equations may not always have been so simple when it comes to baby time, and that things don't have to be the result of something you had control over. If you look at the challenges of taking care of a baby, you can perhaps also be more forgiving about things that you think you 'didn't succeed' at. If you want tips, it's of course good to get tips, but general advice that isn't based on you and your situation, and even worse, pointing fingers, doesn't create better parents.
