About the early days – with Sara Norrbom

Sara, one half of the duo behind Womensync, became a mom to a little boy, Nilo, ten months ago. We meet and talk about entrepreneurship and the incredible community they have managed to build through Womensync, but above all how it has been the first time as a mother – about expectations, challenges, solutions and myths.

About Sara
Family: Fiancé Dan, son Nilo, born August 2023
Does: Runs Womensync, a company that works with women’s health, partly by spreading knowledge in the field and by selling various related products through its webshop. Since the start in 2020, Sara and her co-founder Susanna have managed to build a large and committed community around issues related to women’s health and openly share their own lives and experiences linked to body, health and well-being. Womensync is today a team of four people and they send hundreds of orders a week from their e-commerce.

How would you describe becoming a mother for you?
–It has actually felt so natural. I don’t think I had many expectations about parenting, so I can best describe it as being very natural. I think it’s so fascinating that every day he becomes more and more a little person. Since the pregnancy, I have felt so curious about him, his personality, who he is. However, I am a bit traumatized by the birth itself, and find it difficult at first to even think about giving birth to another child at some point in the future.

Was there anything specific that happened during childbirth?
–I had an extremely fast opening phase and as this is not usually the case for first-time mothers, I was advised to stay at home. I felt so alone and not trusted. The contractions were so intense and painful and I felt abandoned. By the time I was allowed into labor, I was 10 cm dilated and it was time to push. The final stage went well, but I really needed to be in the right place, with the right support and possible pain relief much earlier.

Sara says that she felt a great need to talk about the birth to process the experience. “I can’t understand some people who barely talk about the birth afterwards! Like only mention something about it in passing when you first meet with baby! It’s crazy, because it’s such a big thing to go through as a woman. I’ve wanted to talk about everything, and I still do.”

About expectations and challenges

What has been your biggest challenge as a mom?
-Both breastfeeding, hormone adjustment and lack of recovery have been challenging. The breastfeeding because I got a sore nipple early on that never got better and caused a lot of pain throughout the breastfeeding, the hormone adjustment that made me feel so depressed at times in the first few months, and the lack of rest that came from Nilo not sleeping for long periods of time, and that we would be way too social there in the beginning… and yes at the same time balancing with work to keep Womensync running of course.

How have you been feeding?
–I breastfed for eight months but started bottle training when Nilo was a few weeks old to get him used to accepting bottles too. We did this to make it more flexible and be able to hand over the feeding to Dan occasionally if needed. Now that I’ve stopped breastfeeding, I sometimes wonder why I didn’t stop a little earlier. I was in so much pain on one breast and it makes me a little sad to think that I let myself suffer for so long.

We talk a bit about expectations and Sara tells us that she had a fear of how the psychological stress of having a child, which you can hear about, could manifest itself in her.

–Postpartum psychosis, postpartum depression, lactation psychosis – these things scared me as I have several relatives who have suffered from this. I decided to bring it up with my midwife at the MVC. This led to me actually getting a doctor’s appointment at the maternity ward I was due to give birth at to go through how to recognize these conditions as a precaution, and to investigate whether it could be that I had an increased risk of psychosis as a result of having a child, with all that that entails. I did not. In addition to asking about history of mental illness, they asked a lot about whether I felt great fear of childbirth, which I did not. It was very nice to be able to vent my fears and learn more about this. It is so important that there is more talk about this as it is so extremely taboo.

Biggest myth about becoming a mother?
–That you would forget about childbirth! I hear that as soon as it is over, it is forgotten in favor of the new focus with the baby. For me, this is so foreign as it is something I will definitely not forget. I think it’s important to talk about not forgetting or romanticizing childbirth, but to increase acceptance of different feelings and to normalize talking about and processing childbirth experiences, both on an emotional and physical level.

In terms of support, Sara says that, in addition to the support of her fiancé Dan, she has felt a strong sisterhood with other women since becoming a mother. She says that friends with children have been great support, and that women in the Womensync community have shared very valuable experiences.

And if you were to go back in time and give yourself a piece of advice?
–Then I would like to advise myself not to book so much in the first month after giving birth, but to give myself time to rest and heal. Although I had heard that advice myself, I did not follow it, which I regret. I might also have advised myself to round off breastfeeding a little earlier.

Have you gotten any unsolicited advice?
-Well,I don’t know about advice… but at first I remember being uncomfortable when people asked “is he going to breastfeed again?”. Nilo ate extremely often in the beginning, and although it was probably not meant as criticism, it felt hard to be “pointed out” about breastfeeding which was still something new and overwhelming. Not least to just try to feel relaxed sitting half exposed and breastfeeding among other people.

About alone time and the relationship

What do you do when you get a rare moment to yourself?
–Besides working, I try to prioritize taking a little SPA moment for myself in the bathroom. A little music and massage with my Gua Sha to boost the lymphatic system and reduce tension, dry brush my body, take a hot shower and lubricate myself with a lovely (natural and perfume-free) oil.

What would you like to do if you had more time for yourself?
-Haha, same but maybe catch up with my IR lamp too!

Has your partner done anything memorable to support you in motherhood?
-Hetakes a lot of responsibility for the home, shopping, cooking and doing the dishes.

How did your relationship with your partner change after you became parents?
–It has just felt so good and nice that we are a small family. We are both self-employed and set up a plan early on to optimize energy levels, or avoid both of us getting too tired at the same time. What we do is we sleep in different rooms – me and the baby in one room during the weekdays and Dan undisturbed in another. Friday and Saturday we switch, so I get to sleep undisturbed and sleep in the morning. It’s worked really well for us and I think it’s reduced potential irritation between us. I recommend it to anyone who has the opportunity to sleep in different rooms.

What quality do you hope your child has inherited from you?
-Ihope he dares to discover the world and dares to follow his heart !

Is there a stage in your child’s life that you particularly look forward to?
-Yes,until we can start fantasizing together!